When we all show up to stand on The Line…

Some things I want to address about Auditions:

-When people bring headshots and resumes to a Community Theatre audition, I get a little disgusted. 99% of Community Theatres nowadays will have a digital camera with which they will take your picture at the time you show up. They will do this whether or not you provide the professional, glossy 8×10. And 100% of Community Theatres will make you fill out an Audition Form, no matter what sort of resume you bring with you.
And if it is a Community Theatre, you are NOT getting paid. Therefore, if they are going to MAKE me take another picture and fill out another resume, and they are not going to pay me, they are not getting even a FEW cents of my money in the form of glossy paper and fancy printer ink. Just isn’t happening.

-People who prepare monologues when they aren’t asked for specifically. When an audition notice says “we will accept one-minute monologues, but readings from the script will happen” or whatever like that. To me, this says one of two things. Either A) you don’t have enough confidence in your own ability to stand up in front of the adjudicators with a stranger or two and act a scene you may not have seen before, sharing the stage, or B) You feel the overwhelming need to have more face time on stage in front of the adjudicators. Which means you aren’t particularly comfortable sharing a stage to show off your talents.
And for the LOVE of all that is on Earth. If they say “one minute monologue” keep it within at least 1:15… really. Really. Cause all you do is hold up the audition process if they DON’T cut you off, and look like an ass for being unable to follow directions if they DO cut you off. Actually, you look like an ass who is unable to follow directions whether they cut you off or not, because they said “one minute.”
I prepare monologues, for auditions that positively require them. I time those suckers while rehearsing them and will sometimes wear a watch and incorporate a subtle hand motion suitable for the character that allows me to see the watch. Either that, or I take a monologue that is only about 45 seconds long, and I incorporate some of the things I know about silence to make it get there, powerfully. Silence, if carried out correctly, doesn’t mean you’ve forgotten your lines.<br>
I’ve bombed plenty of monologues for auditions- through nerves, forgetfulness or underpreparation. I’m not saying I’m better than anyone else. I’m just saying, that acing or bombing it is LESS conspicuous if you have first followed the rules. Time limit= time limit. Really.

-Those who have no loudness filter. No loudness filter can be caused by either of the following two things, or a combination of both. Either you don’t know what it means to project your voice, you think that aggressive/active emotions automatically mean screaming/intense voices… or both. That is not the case. Neither is it the case that projecting your voice means blowing your vocal cords sky high.
I ought not to be able to hear you on the street outside of the theatre. That is not projecting, that is screaming. The people at the back of the theatre need to hear you clearly. That can be achieved without screeching.
Aggressive/active emotions like anger, excitement, passion, needn’t be expressed with screaming. If you do that in real life, try acting like you don’t. You are, after all, an Actor, if you are at an audition. If you don’t do it in real life, why would you do it on a stage?

This is not to say I am a perfect Audition-goer. I have been not cast, and cast, and enthusiastically cast, and courted for a role, and rejected on sight. But, I also notice that people who tend to take things too seriously, are not the ones who are cast either.
I really want to respect the people I attend auditions with, both friends and people I have never seen before. So I am just asking PLEASE understand where I am coming from based on what I have seen in 15 years of auditioning for theatre, dance and musical performances.
I just want everyone to be the best Audition-goers that they can be, to produce the best Performances that are possible in whatever venue, town, state, country you are in. Really.

I’m just an opinionated lady, and a Princess at that, so ya know. I have to express myself.


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